Women’s Default Response

girl walking

If you are going to be walking up and approaching women, you need to be aware that by default they will barely give you a response, or in some cases they will give you shit. Here are some ways to deal with their default response.

Always assume the burden of the interaction. The approach is on you, the girl will not give you anything the first few minutes, you need to ramble and lead the conversation. Expect the girl to be distant, or to give you shit.

If she’s not expecting to be opened, you will have caught her by surprise. She doesn’t know you’re cool, normal. It is on you to prove otherwise by bringing fun and value early in the interaction.

If she’s expecting to be opened, she might give you shit. I noticed that at bars/clubs when girls are expecting to be opened they might give you shit right away, maybe even a lot of shit, so you need to pass the shit tests, keep up the fun vibes and see where the conversation leads. Usual shit given: ‘Is that your pick up line?’


Watch the Body Language

In her reality, you could be a weirdo, an asshole, a loser. She might have been approached by guys who creeped her out before. You need to prove to her that you’re cool.

In the early part of the interaction, watch her body language, if she has a defensive stance, or if she’s closing up, address it, and keep rambling: “I didn’t mean to scare you”, or “Sorry I know this is weird”. Do this if her body language communicates: “I don’t know what’s going on, is he real, is this a prank”.


Bring Value and Be Persistent- Initially

She will test you to see if you’re okay with approaching, or if you walk away. She might just stare at you quietly, to see how you react, you need to hold your frame and keep the fun vibe.

Don’t give up, if she’s not being responsive. Eye contact is important, remain persistent, have fun, joke around, and show that you’re okay with approaching women. Don’t be apologetic, you shouldn’t believe that what you’re doing is wrong.

Give yourself a chance to get to know each other. Stay persistent, if you feel a little pressure on her, take a step back and say a statement of empathy: “Sorry, I know this is weird”. Just be aware, if she gives you a no, take it as a rejection and walk away- you will know clearly if she is rejecting you.

A statement of empathy can be anything to show that you are aware that what you did may have weirded her out, or may not have been something she’s accustomed to. You can say something self deprecating like “You probably only talk to rich guys, look at me I’m a weirdo”, or a quick apology: “Sorry I’m just in a good mood, I noticed <insert something about her>, and I wanted to say hi”

If she rejects you. You still gain respect in her mind, trust me. Not many guys approach girls, and girls know that. Just wish her a good day and walk away.



Don’t Walk Away If She’s Not Responsive

When nothing is coming from her, don’t leave too early! Give yourself a chance, give her a chance.

Your frame should be “the moment I said hi, I already won'”and “even a lame approach is better than no approach at all”. Once you approach, don’t walk away and see where the interaction leads.

Again, you should have no goals for yourself, and as long as you approach you have no chance of losing. You will be better off than before you have approached her: you either learned how to open better, or she likes you.

Don’t be overly pushy, don’t touch her, just eye contact, and vocal tonality.

Remember, if she rejects you, walk away.

For more, see The Three Rules for Beginners in Game

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